What Is Happening In Sweden?


 I'm back again just to show a life sign after a well needed break from wallowing in my emetophobia, doing what I always think I do the best; trying to save the planet. Thank you for your patience. Everything is fine. Hoping you are too. 

 I want wallow some more with you about that time during the end of last year when I caught the notorious tummy bug, and I promise you all that there will no nasty graphic details. Just plain psychology. The thing is that I applied all the things I've written about in this blog in real practice, to make it seem smaller, in a cool and tricky way. Those are the details I want to share with you.
Puke Street in Sweden?

 You see, during this grey, cold and boring Monday from the "pit of hell" I was so tired and gradually stressed out about the odds of being infected, that I barely cared anymore. Sometimes apathy can be useful. I remember this as I couldn't finish my breakfast. That is unusual for being me, although I get up before 5 a.m. to begin my work at 6. For most of people like us that is a warning sign, but I didn't even care.

 During the work hours that morning the crappy feeling continued, but I just assumed that I was tired as usual and on top of that more or less subconsciously anxious. Even during work I had a spontaneous attack of wanting to throw up, but no panic. When I finally came home I just gave up, gave in and did it. And that's it. But here is the kicker: At that time I still thought it happened from anxiety. Or was I somehow persuading myself and repressing reality? It wasn't until I woke up after some hours of sleep that I noticed that I had a fever and got a grip. 

 As vomiting from anxiety would be some magic formula to make vomiting easier. But in my mind it was. That is true news. Now I notify the lies my brain used against me: That vomiting is horrible. It's not. Just a bit unpleasant for a short moment.
I don't know if this information applies to and helps other emetophobic readers. For me I think, it may have to do with that I never throw up unless a norovirus infection. It's the only real association I can relate to. And again, I also used to be mildly to moderately affected by this stressful everyday condition. Still hoping it can give you some relief too.